Week 5

Not much to report.  I finally gave up on scarves.  I got sick of looking sick and pitiful, and having to describe my condition.

I have graduated to covering the tape and bandage with hair - as much as I can fluff up, and a headband to keep it tight and on there.

I head back to Dr. S a week from tomorrow, where I assume he'll look at it, take a picture, and have me come back in a month.

We're basically in heal mode, and there's nothing more I can do.

I'll continue to keep you posted.

If you've read this far, I'd recommend buying stock in Johnson and Johnson or Curad - because I am buying the hell out of non-stick gauze, tape and so on.

Also, get stock in Charming Charlie's because I love their headbands.

To wit:

This is the face (and head) of Pilomatrical Carcinoma

I'm going back this weekend for one with feathers, and a few in bright jazzy colors.  Life, after all, is short.

Four weeks and one day...

If anything, I'm sick of spending money on Telfa pads, tape and headscarves.

Yesterday, I changed my bandage at the end of my work day, before going out for a team-building thing with my department, and it looked a little scary - like, infection scary.

I decided there wasn't anything I could do at that exact moment, so I just girded my loins, and in this case, cranium and got going.

By the time I got home I seemed to be in a better place.  I don't know how to explain it, except to say that seeing green goo on your old bandage is scary.  

I'm pretty sure I'm ok, though.

There's not a lot of pain, unless we're talking about having to pull tape out of my hair to change the aforementioned dressing.  And that hurts pretty much every time.

Even though I was cleared for Zumba,  I haven't gone back. I'm kind of afraid to - plus, this week has been booked pretty solid.

Oh, and it's not all beer and roses from the insurance company.  I owe the radiologist $517.

Awesome.

3 weeks post-procedure. Suture removal.

I saw Dr. S's colleague, whose last name also starts with S -- so we'll call him Dr. S2.  S2, Along with Dr. I looked at the gaping hole in my head and pronounced it "clean as a bell".  We then changed bell to whistle, and they removed the stitches.

He said, whatever I've been doing, to keep it up because it looks perfect.  He said within 3 months, I'll be amazed at how good it looks.

I'll be shedding the scarves by Christmas!!!

It might be worth buying a few new scarves.

Anyway, back to see Dr. S1 n 3 more weeks, and we're moving along.

I cajoled a little and was cleared for Zumba.  I promised to be gentle and stop if things went funky.

Pilomatrical Carcinoma - really two weeks now.

Today is the 2 week mark, and I celebrated by banging my wound into the frame of a kitchen cabinet while getting out a trash can liner.

Nice.  I went and cleaned the wound and re-bandaged, but you know it hurt like hell.  Score one for me.

I've been feeling kind of sorry for myself this week.  It's the scarf, it's the inability to show my scalp.

It actually itched this morning and I was grateful for feeling - anything other than pain.

I managed to lose the surgery weight, as proved by my weigh in this afternoon.

And that, I believe is all I have to say.

Except this.  I have a doctor visit a week from today.  Why did I have a message from their office to remind me?  I don't need the reminder today- that's asking a lot of my memory - short term and otherwise.

And I'll be honest, my mind hasn't been right since the surgery, but I think I'm just addled by my own devices.

Pilomatrical Carcinoma - Two weeks Post-op (well, almost)

I've gone ahead and explained to people at work the reason behind my scarves, although I've been vague with most - citing either "a growth" or "skin cancer".  Depending on how well I know them, or the context, I'll tell more.  Most people think the scarves are cute and didn't realize there was a gaping cesspool being concealed beneath them.

Score one for scarves.

I will say that I cannot seem to sleep enough  - I spent most of the weekend laid out, asleep.

I have resumed all my normal activities except for exercise.  Which blows, because honestly, I do love my Water Aerobics and Zumba classes.  Time will tell.

Meanwhile, this weekend, I'm going out of town for a little boondoggle with my husband's family - they know nothing about my hair cancer, and though I'll have to probably say a little something, I don't care to get into details too much.

My mother will be coming up as well - naturally, she really wants to see it - she's been a nurse for nearly 40 years and so, of course - that's her bag.

I honestly think that's the only reason she's coming.  Isn't that messed up?  Oh well.

The pain comes and goes.  I must have slept on my wound last night, because it's been a little sore today.

I also feel like the manky smell has either mitigated, or I've gotten used to it, or both.

And finally, next week I travel for work - first time since the procedure.  I'm worried, but not overly so.  It's fine.  It will be fine.

So, in summary - the scarves are working, I'm disclosing as I see fit, the pain is under control, and the manky smell is less manky, less smelly.

And a week from tomorrow, I go back to Dr. S.
 
OH!  And, I'm dropping the weight I picked up during my recuperative period.  Tomorrow should be a great weigh-in.

Wish me lots of luck!

More and more

So, the good news - no infection.  The manky smell was a sign that it was time to remove the bolster, which is what they did.  And it was gross.

They cleaned out the wound, took a picture, showed it to me, and bandaged me back up.  Yep, I am going to have to wear telfa on the area for another... month?  Two weeks?  Infinity plus 2/3?

Whatever.  I bought the recommended baby shampoo for gentle hair washing, and some suggested headbands to hold the dressing down.

And, I get to head back in another two weeks.  It just gets better and better.

I seem to have the old gauze smell lingering in my nose.  But at least the great news is - no infection.

The less great news is... it's not over.

Finally, Dr. S told me that pathology hemmed and hawed, but they finally agreed we're dealing with pilomatrical carcinoma.  Well, if not that, what?

Exactly.

So, for now, we wash, we bandage and we wait.

That can't be right...can it?

One of the fears you tend to have when you've had your dome cut into is the overriding fear of infection.  Because, let's face it - there's a fine line between scalp and brain.  I don't want to turn into a zombie.

As I hope you know, I've been compliant.  I've taken it easy, haven't done any travel, haven't over-exerted myself.  I skipped Zumba last night, dammit.

On Saturday, after I carefully washed my hair, I went to World Market and bought some curtains.  While I was there, I felt the incision site oozing a little.  I blotted it, and it appeared to be serum - basically clear, with a tinge of pink.  But it smelled a little like vinegar.  Yeah, I smelled it.   I wanted to make sure it didn't smell like rotten flesh, or brains or whatever.  What do brains smell like?  I don't know.  I do know what putrefaction smells like, and I know what blood smells like - and this smelled like vinegar.  It was a little worrisome, but it was short-lived and I didn't feel bad, so I took my curtains and went home.

This morning, it started again.  It almost felt like the gelatin matrix they used to keep the wound moist cracked, and it started oozing again.

The smell was manky.   On the spectrum of April Fresh to Gangrenous, it veers a little toward the latter - but that could just be the gelatin breaking down.

Am I concerned?  Yes, I am.

But really other than stewing in my own juices (literally - ha, ha), what can I do?   Nothing - I can wait six hours, go see my doctor and hope for the best.

But I really feel like I smell like garbage.  

Here are the facts, though - I don't have a fever.  The incision site, and in fact, my head/scalp as a whole doesn't feel warm to the touch or inflamed.  So, let's just assume it's time to change the dressing or remove it altogether... let the mother breathe.

I will say that today, the pain is next to nill - and that's a good thing.

I've taken some Tylenol as a precaution. 

So, we'll see if I have scalp rot, and I'll let you know where that stands later today.

BTW - the curtains from World Market look awesome.

Aaaand, ow.

I've been reasonably lucky about pain, but today, something is different.  I can't seem to get ahead of it.  I hate to even move because it jars something on my scalp.  I sneezed, and that didn't hurt, but I'll tell you, laughing hurts.

And I'm such a joyous person, not laughing isn't an option.

Tomorrow, I'm following up with Dr. S.

In fact, 24 hours from now, I'll know more.

That seems to be my theme.

So, I hope if you're reading this, you feel hopeful.  Because I do.

Although, I am bummed to miss Zumba tonight.

Next week...

Cancer-Free (?) Since Last Wednesday

So, the recovery continues.  I washed my hair Saturday morning, and I'm about to wash it again before I head to work.

The good news is that I have basically enough hair to cover the gauze when my hair is clean and fluffed out, so I don't have to scarf it today.

I might anyway - or at least have one handy.

The pain is near constant.  It's a dull ache, and I'll be hitting up the tylenol all day.

I have training this morning, which should go reasonably well.

I'm beyond tired.  I didn't sleep well last night, but woke up early to get my husband off to work - he had to be in two hours earlier than usual.

So, that's pretty much it.

Tomorrow, suture removal!!!!!

YAAAAAY!